I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
My feet surprised me
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
