my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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