better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
