Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
