Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
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