Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
