is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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