I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
We left the knife in your bed.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
