All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
