check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
