Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
