OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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