I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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