Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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