How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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