Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
my liver is dry heaving
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
