Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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