i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
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