She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
This couple is walking their pig around campus
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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