is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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