can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
