Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Please don't give away my fajitas
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
