I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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