You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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