I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
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