The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
