Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
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Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
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I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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