thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize