Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
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6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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