Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
