how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
