can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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