3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
