also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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