i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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