I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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