dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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