Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
