I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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