At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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