I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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