I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
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Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
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So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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