How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
