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• (718): View more from New York

  There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"

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• (254): View more from Texas

  You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"

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  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Just found my car keys in your throw-up.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.

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• (805): View more from California

  Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (337): View more from Louisiana

  Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now

  (1-224): View more from Illinois

  It's five in the morning. wtf?

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived

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• (310): View more from California

  You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.

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