I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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