Dual....:-)
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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