I'm drive I can fine osifer
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
someone owes me an orgasm
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
