Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
40s are totally the cure
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Randomize