Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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