Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Of course I have a pirate flag
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
